This is so, so stupid.

I know that most, if not all of you, use Facebook. How do I know this? I’m magic. No, actually I have the referral statistics right in front of me. Gottcha, chumps. Probably one of the absolute stupidest memes started on Facebook a few days ago. I waited to write this because I hoped that people would understand and feel shamed. Yep, I’m bitching about the “write your bra color as your status” meme.

This meme started from a random chain e-mail without a source. Somebody from the interwebs should track it down so that said individual can be tarred and feathered. I’ll admit, that is a bit too much, but when else am I going to see a person tarred and feathered for interweb stupidity? Most of you ladeez have probably received something that reads like such:

Some fun is going on….just write the colour of your bra in your status..just the colour, nothing else, and send this on to ONLY girls no men… it will be neat to see if this will spread the wings of cancer awareness. It will be fun to see how long it takes before the men will wonder why all the girls have a color in their status…thanks ladies!

I hate this for three reasons.

1. This is deliberately sexist.
2. This is something that is custom built for white people.
3. It is stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid.

Okay. I will explain. My mother was diagnosed with cancer in 2009. Julie’s mom has beaten cancer TWICE. We can both tell you how hard it is to have somebody so close to you face this disease, but I think it is more important to note that all of our family and friends can tell a similar story. Breast cancer is not a “woman’s problem”. It affects us all equally. Men can watch the women they love fight, but they can also be diagnosed with breast cancer themselves. I love that a male friend of mine does monthly checks on himself because cancer is non-discriminant. The same cannot be said for this stupid endeavor.

Mary Carmichael of Newsweek made this point, “They’re not saying a word about cancer. This isn’t awareness or education; it’s titillation.” Julie and I wholeheartedly agree. This is why Julie has taken it upon herself to remind people that “Cockteasing doesn’t cure cancer”. This is desperate and pathetic, and it is nothing but an insult to men. The way I understand this goes like such, “Hey, everybody! Take a moment to picture my tits. Got it? Now think about if they just simply rotted off. Not so nice, right? Well this happens to millions of women. They also lose their hair. Gross, right?” Were you offended by that? Good. The same principle applies.

It also bothers me that it seems like women only think that men care about issues that are more commonly “women’s issues” if the issue is sexualized. So men only care if they want to fuck it? They are not empathetic? Fuck that. I found a lump in my breast two years ago while I was playing Halo 3 (I was victorious and needed to be obscene). It was truly terrifying. I wasn’t scared because I thought I may lose my breast and hair and that would not make me a woman anymore. No. I was afraid I had motherfucking cancer. Do you know who offered me the most support? My mother, my boyfriend, and my MALE best friend. None of them showed any concern that my tit may be lopped off. They were concerned for ME.

The next point I raised was that this seemed like it was tailor made for white people. Before you get up in arms and call me a racist, let me just say that I think that white people are ridiculous. They entertain me so very much. I get to balance a perfect mix of shame and entertainment at the antics of these folks since I am only half white myself. Stuff White People Like (2008) is a hilarious book and blog by Christian Lander that helps me to while away the hours. He states that white people “firmly believe that all of the world’s problems can be solved through ‘awareness’-meaning the process of making other people aware of problems, magically causing someone else, like the government, to fix it” (p. 21 and the link provided).

Basically this means, nobody does shit about a problem. They just bitch and moan until somebody more intelligent fixes it. Let me provide a real life example. I get into a lot of fights with the homeless citizens of Chicago. To be fair, they start it. Don’t lean into my car and tell me to give you money. It’s highway robbery. They never ask me if I can give them money. The statement is never in the form of a question, it is always a command. That shit don’t fly with me. Julie has observed this. Raising awareness would be as if she said, “Now, Jess. You really shouldn’t fight with hobos.” and left one of them to put me in my place. Instead, she did something about the problem. She gave me pepper spray since my “mouth writes checks my body can’t cash”. She observed a problem, identified a potential solution, and took the steps to remedy the problem.

This meme was intended to “spread the wings of awareness”. I think it was some slag that wanted an excuse to get attention for her bra selection, but that’s just me. I think that we don’t need anymore “awareness” at this point. We know this is a problem. We need people to get off their asses and do something. Raise money for research. Participate in Folding @ Home on your PS3 or super computer. Candy stripe a cancer ward for all I care. Just actually do something for each other instead of thinking that somebody else will.

And this meme is dumb as hell.

-Jess

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